True Notebooks: A Writer's Year at Juvenile Hall

In Chapter 8, another HRO, Nathaniel Hall, joins the class. At this time, the lockdown has not yet been called off. Hall is eager to prove both his sophistication and his indifference to the program as a whole, describing his visit as a "close encounter of the criminal kind" (81). Francisco reads an essay of his own, in which he questions his faith in God; the boys are initially shocked, as few people are willing to admit something so personal. Because of the lockdown, the class is more restless, and little writing is done. Mark notes to himself:

[...] a group of sixteen- and seventeen-year-old boys, after being in their cells for a week with no radio, television, recreation, exercise, or school would have a hard time keeping quiet. On the other hand, I didn't want them to think of our Wednesday night class as simply an hour of recreation (84).

Eventually, by the end of the session, Nathaniel writes a gripping personal story. However, he does not stay long, being placed on punishment for an altercation with another inmate soon after.

In Chapter 9, another student, Patrick, shows an interest in drawing and illustration, but has little faith in his interest coming to fruition, being behind bars. At the chapter's close, the writing becomes more personal and reflective: a story from Kevin about his mother, and his own loneliness, and—to everyone's surprise—a story from Nathaniel Hall, who, despite being held in isolation, has completed his assignment. Hall's story is excellent, which discourages Patrick. Mark tells Patrick about his experience playing cello—how the famous cellist Yo-yo Ma discouraged him from continuing playing, citing it as a bad example of comparing oneself to others. The boys learn the lesson, and, with it, to combat their anxiety performance surrounding writing. In addition to this, Mark notices the boys have begun to channel these feelings into their writing, which becomes more reflective, and even philosophical, as Kevin's essay shows: "Darkness tries to smother my true being day by day. At times the light shines through all the darkness but that is seldom. Happiness is very scarce, too. It feels as if loneliness, hate, and anger comes as every minute passes" (97). The source of this negativity, however, is not abstract or unrecognized: "I thought this place was supposed to teach you something, but no, it just punishes people. Why should you change your life if all you hear all day is what a worthless piece of shit you are?" (99). Mark has no answers.